How Come You Put On So Much Weight?

This is a question I get more often than one might think. And I think it is a good question. Weight does not just suddenly pop up and it is not like I do not want to be healthy and look good when I stare back at myself in the mirror. Believe it or not, I have thought about why I keep gaining weight for more than 25 years. I have roughly 100 hours of psychology hours behind me,  several bad habits and eating disorders behind me, along with 10+ books about weight loss and about 10 different fad diets under my belt (anything from Weight Watcher to electricity run through my body).

My husband asked me this question a few days ago, as we were talking about when I was anorexic with a tendency to binge. This was the time, I was skinniest. I was 130 lb. So not insanely skinny but still lower than the average I should have been at (144 lb). More about this later.

This question got me thinking. I am probably not the only one who has had this question asked and I am sure a lot of you are asking yourselves this very question, but you might be to polite to ask (my husband is not). It is, also, an important question to ask one self when trying to lose weight as you need to dig in and learn about your habits more deeply than simply “I should not eat that”.

Everyone has their story and no story is better or worse than others, as we are all different and react differently to what we are exposed to in life that build our habits. Mine started in early childhood and simply kept getting reinforced through my childhood. Once those habits have been instilled in you they are insanely hard to break. Not until I was in my 30′ did I start really understanding my habits and you can’t change them if you are not aware of them. So lesson number 1. Learn about your habits, good and bad.

One of my first memories of childhood was when I was 3-4 years of age. My parents were fighting (which were not uncommon in those days) and to spare me from the stress of the yelling they would place me in front of the TV with a small bowl of candy and they were off to the kitchen. Of course I could hear them yell anyways, which would make any child feel unsafe so I emerged myself in the TV and my bowl of candy. The reason why this exact memory is so important is that it is my first memory of what happens when I binge. I am in front of the TV or computer and sugar just goes in, one after the other. After a stressful day or if I have been in a fight, my go to remedy to make myself feel better is the TV and my bag of goodies.

This habit got reinforced throughout my childhood. My surroundings where not getting any calmer. Matter of fact, they got worse. At age 5 my parents divorced and soon enough it was time for my sisters and mother to fight each other.

As I started growing into my teenage years, I was not the rebellious type. I internalized things more than my sisters. With the insecurity of trying to find out who you are as a teenager and the fear of being unpopular started my next habit. Binging! It started out with me wanting to lose that “baby fat”. I put it in quotation marks as that was what my mom called it, although others were not as nice about it. Ever since I was a kid, I was body shamed and food shamed by pretty much everyone in my family (a few exceptions, love you dad!).

Looking back, I was not overweight, I was just not skinny but that was considered overweight and that is something I still live under today. I have a hard time distancing myself from that image and just accept that my body is more voluptuous than those of my sisters and mother’s side of the family. My dad’s side of the family had a bigger tendency to carry more weight than average but unfortunately, we did not really engage with that side of the family and my father’s mother died when he was very young so I never got to meet her. Although, I am told, that I look like her. She must have been a very good looking woman 😉

To put the pressure into perspective. When I was skinniest at 130 lb, I was still called overweight and having “baby fat”. Yes, insane, I know, but my shape and voluptuous features simple gives me the look of being a bit choppy.

This constant pressure, although, I am sure it was not intentional, drove me into my dabble in anorexia. I say “dabble” as I had a friend at the time, whom saved my life and made me wake up from what I was doing to myself, fairly early into my days of not eating or binging with purging afterwards. If he is reading this, he knows who he is and I simply want to say: Thank you!

As the pressure was still there, the habit of using food as a comforter was readily available, I instead started binging and that is how I ended up with the other side of a eating disorder – over eating.

Over eating was something I hid as I felt it was shameful. I was not supposed to eat all of those treats and foods as I was supposed to lose weight and be skinny like my friends and sisters. But my feelings were overwhelming and I could not control my urges. This urge simply stayed and I tried over time to control it in different ways. I still have the urges today but with some really capable psychologists, I have gotten some great tools to recognize when the urge comes on, why it is there and that I have a choice. The choice is harder than you think, but I am slowly learning to accept my choices. Good or bad. And I think, I am finally growing up.

After over eating for roughly 20 years, you put on weight. I have had more excuses than I can count but at least now I see my excuses and I can choose to act on them or grow up and say no.

The bigger picture of my story is showing how important positive body image is for especially young people. I hope that my blog will help people to realize that they are beautiful no matter who they are and what they look like. It is truly, what is inside that determines your outer beauty.

XOXO

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Results – Step 4 To Losing Weight

This last step might be obvious but it is the most important. Results! The point of all of this is results so they should be highlighted and celebrated.

I know that in the long run, I might not see results every week but the goal is to lose a 100 pounds. This is not simply for the reason of looking good, fitting into clothes better etc. It is about my health and how I would like to live my life.

My husband and I have a goal of retiring as soon as possible and then travel the world. We want to make sure we spend as much time together as we possibly can and that means that I need to take my health seriously.

As I have written in previous posts, I have high cholesterol. That in itself is not killing me at this very moment but it can in the long run. Especially, with my family history, it is important that I take that seriously as it could shorten my life significantly or decrease my life quality in such a way that I would not be able to enjoy the things that I look forward to the most.

Although, this is a great motivation in itself, it is at times not enough, so I have set up a few small rewards each time I hit my goals. As my first main goal is 30 pounds with 5 pound intervals I have come up with 6 rewards to begin with.

So below I have listed the desired pounds with the reward next to it.

248 lb – New summer workout capri pants. The ones I have, all have wholes in them and some of them are not really that comfortable and convenient.

243 lb – It might seem odd but I love being organized, so cleaning out of my clothes is actually a treat. Yes, I want to sort my clothing and find out which I need to get rid off and which I still love and use and which I think I would want when I have lost my weight. This should be fun and I will make sure to post about the fun times.

238 lb – My feet seriously needs some love, so I will get some products that can help me out when taking care of my feet.

233 lb – Gloves for working out. I am making use of bar and dumb bells more and more and it does at times hurt my hands. So thought gloves might be a good idea.

228 lb – I think it is time for a new dress or two. If you know me, you know that I have way more dresses than a woman needs but they are just too pretty, practical and fun.

223 lb –  As this is the 30 pound mark, I want to celebrate in style, quit literally. Therefore, my 30 pound reward is to get my hair done. My favorite hairdresser is really expensive so it is a once a year treat (if not more seldom) but I would love to go back to my short hair.

I knew, I had gained weight and above number is way higher than what I stated last time but I just learned that it matters where you set your scale. Where I have been setting it roughly takes off 20 pounds so I did not gain that much but it just gives me a more true look at what I weight. I, therefore, now have to weigh myself in the kitchen where there are tiles and not wood or carpet. Bummer, for my confidence but looking at the true numbers is more important.

As I get closer to my 100 pound goal, I am sure the results will have to adjust slightly but for now, I know I can loose 30 pounds without too many concerns and I will go through the results as I get closer to my 100 pound goal.

I am really excited to reach my goals and I hope you will be with me along the way, cheering me on, go for a run or simply share your most delicious healthy recipes.

XOXO

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Consistent Motivation – Step 3 To Losing Weight

I want to apologize in advance for this long post. So many things motivate me and so many things can help me stay on track. However, I do know, that no matter the amount of motivation, sometimes my desire of eating more or sugar is stronger than listing my motivations and sometimes I simply forget them in my desire for the foods that I crave.

I, therefore, thought it a good idea to list all of the things that could motivate me so I have something to look back at to help me remember why I am doing this in the first place.

I want to list all the things that my friends and family can help me with as well. As you are part of my motivation and as I mentioned in an earlier post. Sometimes, I need a little help to stay on track as I can have a weak backbone.

Also, I will list images, sayings and tough words to keep me on track. These will be a mix of images and words, I aspire to or images that should wake me up should I have a moment of being too weak to take the next step. It would be helpful if you help me make this list longer. Post images of what you find beautiful, what you aspire to, saying that keep you motivated or images that you know you loath but it is a reminder of never going back there.

Firstly, my list of things that keep me motivated and will keep me on track.

  • Stopping the perpetual sweating when it is hot outside. I know it is a bit odd but there is nothing more unattractive than someone sweating.
  • Feeling better. When I am in good shape. I eat healthy and balanced. I simply feel better, my mood is fluctuating less and I feel like I can conquer the world.
  • Rewards. Having something to look forward to is a big one for me. For this reason, I will set up a “Rewards Calendar” for every 5 pound goals that I reach and each main goal that I get to.
  • Having people around me helps me stay on track. So do not be shy.
  • A good kick in the ass (verbally of course) is always a winner. I  get competitive (yes me, I get competitive).
  • Listen to people and their advice. A lot of you have already given me such great advice and I will start taking those to heart and try them out once I start losing my motivation. So keep the advice coming.
  • Not fitting into clothes that I like. I know this is superficial but I can’t help it. I like to know that I could wear whatever clothes I want.
  • Wearing a pair of beautiful heels without feeling like I am running a marathon. This is so going to be one of my rewards…
  • Good, healthy recipes help me stay motivated. There is nothing like an easy, health, filling and yummy recipe. So please share if you come across one and I will start sharing some of the meals that I do. Maybe you can get motivated by some of my recipes.
  • Singing, has always been a release for me and always will be. It is, also, a great distraction (one of the 3 D’s Weight Watchers use in their program).
  • Freedom. This is an odd one for me as weight loss is not in itself freedom but the opposite but there will be some freedom at the end of it. I will have the freedom to not me held back by my size and abilities to hike, travel, simply feel comfortable around other people. Freedom is in that sense the most important and biggest motivation for me.

Now, for what you can help me with. I do not think anyone can lose weight on their own. I know, it is me making the choices. Me, who has to get my ass out of bed in the morning when I really do not want to get out from underneath the covers but what friends and family help with are the tough days. The days when my cravings take over and I lose myself in them.

Invite me for a walk, talk or simply send me an image or saying what helps you stay on track. The love is what helps me when it is most difficult.

So to help you, help me, I wanted to give you some ideas of what you can do, either if I ask for your help or if you simply feel like it.

  • Show me images that inspire you
  • Show me images that should wake me up
  • Give me a pep talk
  • Share a saying that is dear to your heart
  • Invite me to things that will help me burn calories or invite me to a restaurant than can inspire my own healthy cooking.
  • Join me at my gym (I have unlimited guest passes) to make sure I give it my all on the days I really do not want to go.
  • Share your own goals and aspirations.
  • Help me celebrate when I reach my goals and make sure to compliment me when it is warranted.
  • Give me a verbally kick in the ass.
  • Share your thoughts and advice.
  • Share your best healthy recipes

This is a list that will be ever growing but what I could come up with at this moment. So do not be surprised if it will be re-posted with updates.

I have images and sayings that help me keep straight. It is a mix of uncomfortable images, aspirations, things that I would like (yes the material stuff), goals and simply truths that I live by or try to aspire to.

I will try and post these images and sayings on Facebook and Instagram when I am starting to lose my motivation and I would love for you to like, share or comment with your own thoughts and images that keep you motivated.

Stay in touch!

XOXO

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Guidelines – Step 2 To Losing Weight

Losing weight is a numbers game. You need to take in less calories, than you can burn. You need to burn 3,500 calories to lose 1 pound. This means, to lose 5 pounds, I need to burn 17,500 calories more than I take in to be able to lose 5 pounds.

Therefore, my guidelines are very much based on numbers to make sure I will get to my first 5 pound weight loss.

For every 7 days, I will have 1 Off day from exercise and tracking my food. The only caveat is that on my off day, I burn 2,500 calories on that day.

I will have 4 days with burning 2,500 calories and 3 days with burning 3,000 (give or take a few calories of course). This will leave me with a total burn of 19,000 calories.

My intake of calories will have to be less than the 19,000 calories in order for me to lose weight so with a day off where I don’t track calories, I have to create a plan that will allow me for this.

I, therefore, estimate that I if I take in 1,500 calories on 3 of the days and 1,600 calories on the other three that will leave me with a total of 9,300 calories. This leaves me with the ability to eat no less than 2,700 calories on my day off and still manage to loose 2 pounds each week.

With this much cushioning on my day off that leaves me thinking very comfortable and that it is doable. It, also, leaves me with a sense of not having to feel bad after my day off. 

It is all easier said than done but as I am breaking out my days I hope this will mold my thoughts around the concept of ‘taking one day at a time’.

I will keep you all posted on my weekly progress on how many calories I have taken in, burnt and how much I have lost for the week but keep an eye out for the different things I might take advantage off to make sure I stay on track and keep my goal. Which leaves me to my next step and my next post: Consistent Motivation.

Do you think it would be helpful if I post what I ate during the week?

Keeping constant track of everything will be my challenge, but i hope, I will be able to get into a routine that works. Hopefully, I have an understanding husband that helps me and understands the hours it requires to keep up with all of this.

I love the support, I have around me and my friends who are able to keep giving suggestions. Go to events and make sure I get back on track. More to come on this!

I will start posting more about what I do during the week to stay motivated, to get to my calorie count and what might be on the calendar for me in the future in case you want to join me. I have dancing in Bryant Park, Yoga in Inwood Hill Park and testing out the different Planet Fitness locations around Manhattan (and I can invite a guest every time).

If anyone want to join me, let me know. The more the merrier and it is so much more fun to do it together!

The more I write, the more I get my motivation back and I am getting very excited. You, my audience, will therefore be more of a priority than you have been in the past. You are part of keeping my motivation.

Stay tuned on the next post.

XOXO

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Goals – Step 1 To Losing Weight

I do not think there has been a diet, book or TV program I have not watched that has always started with “Goals”. Some have said to set yourself the overarching end goal, others have said to set yourself small goals, medium goals… you get the point.

One thing most have in common is a set of smaller attainable goals that will give you the sense of victory. This has always been both a motivator but, also, one of my pitfalls. I would reach goal 1 or 2 and then be so pleased with myself I would “allow” myself X amount of time to enjoy not constantly thinking about what I eat and drink and how often I go to the gym and how much I burn while I am there. This is all well and good, however, I would always forget to move towards the next goal and I would end up going back to goal 1, if not -1, after having put on more weight than I had already lost.

My thoughts are therefore, how can I avoid my own trap?

Talking to my friend Claudia yesterday made me realize that there is a thought behind the idea of what Weight Watchers do (that is her thing) and she managed to loose 60 pounds on that system. You would get 1 day off every week so you had a bit of a break from counting, managing, dealing and simply being in a constant state of competition with yourself.

I think, I will take her advice and try that out this time around. I will set goals but leave myself to breath 1 day every week, which honestly, also works much better with my lifestyle and my other blog, as I have restaurant reviews pretty much every week. Luckily, I have my husband to take care of the leftovers.

From the title and my post from yesterday, there are a few steps I need before I feel like I can succeed.

  • Step 1: Set Goals
  • Step 2: Set Guidelines
  • Step 3: Consistent Motivation
  • Step 4: Results

This is one of four posts on setting myself up to success and the only thing I know that could knock me off my course is the need for a schedule but I will have to bite the bullet and just deal with it.

I hate schedules. I have never been a fan and I tend to be a “off the cuff” kind of person

I should probably get on with it, setting my goals but before doing so I wanted to make sure you all were aware of my thoughts behind my goals and why I decided to set this type of goals.

I want to set small goals. Even smaller than I have done in the past to make sure that I celebrate the victories. The older I get the harder it is to loose the weight and I should be rewarded and celebrate even those small moments.

We all know that I need to lose 100 pounds but that is a bit too much to think about so this time, I am simply going for an overall goal of 30 pounds which would then be divided into even smaller goals. I will celebrate ever 5 pounds that I loose. The celebrating and rewards that would come with every 5 pounds would be part of kicking off my motivation as well, although much more would go into Consistent Motivation.

I am not going to set myself a timeline, as that would simply stress me out and I know too well what stress does to me. I give up before I have begun and I start stress eating and I put on more weight. So there we have it. 30 pounds with 5 pound intervals.

I will still keep you all informed on where I am weight wise but I will move away from my weight pictures as I have done in the past and instead focus on the things that I do to reach my goal. More on that in my next few posts.

Stay tuned and I am so happy that I have a following that has not given up on me just yet, while I keep struggling to lose the weight that my body so desperately needs to get rid of.

XOXO

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Confession

I have been slacking off. When I got back from vacation I found myself having a hard time getting back into my routine both with food and with my exercise.

I do not really have any good excuse. Just that I did not have the motivation. I guess this is not uncommon but I kept thinking about what I can do about getting back to my groove and motivation.

I concluded that there was not anything I could do but simply wait until I felt my motivation come back on its own as it tends to come back once I start feeling unusually large and uncomfortable in my own skin. And as usual, I was right. I have gained weight (not sure how much as I have been on a scale yet) and I am starting to feel that my health is deteriorating.

As soon as I felt these things change, my motivation started coming back to me. I guess it is my brain naturally telling me I need to start focusing on my health again. I just hope I am not starting from scratch this time around.

My next step was to figure out what I could do to keep my motivation. Usually, I need a set of goals, I need a consistency of motivation, I need results and I need guidelines.

My next post will be about setting my goals, guidelines and how I could go about creating consistent motivation and then I would simply have to trust that the results will come.

Mike and I have been doing A LOT with my other blog that I write for SociallySuperlative. Perhaps, too much as I have been writing articles one after the other and I have not really been motivated to write here for the lack of energy and inspiration.

As we always agreed that health comes first, I will try and cut down on my articles with SociallySuperlative and focus more on what really matters. My weight loss.

Some of the things, I know motivate me are seeing images of myself being overweight, as I hate looking at images of myself, especially, when it is obvious that I am much larger than everyone else. So do not be shy to share those images. I tend to stop being motivated as soon as I start seeing results which is not really a great trade and I have a long way to go an loosing 10 pounds is not really rocking the boat when I have a total of 100 pounds to loose. So please encourage me continuing this process and help me if I reach out for help, motivation or simply the need to get distracted from eating a tub of ice cream.

One thing I do know, is, that I can’t do it alone. I need the help of my family and friends as my backbone tends to be a bit weak.

Hoping for your help, encouragement and engagement and I will try and commit to my new plan (to come).

All help is welcome!

 

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Week 46: It Has Been A While

Finally back from vacation. And yes, I mean finally!!! I need a vacation from my vacation. Or maybe I just need a new job that can motivate me and get me out the door in the morning without thinking “so what is my new career going to be”. Well, there are so many things to talk about since it has been such a long time but let’s start with the numbers first, as they are most important.

I gained weight but honestly, I did not think I had as my clothes fit me better now than when I left. I, also, just gained 1.6 pounds so not overwhelmingly lot. I am now 220lb even. Because my clothes is fitting better, yet I gained weight, I want to start keeping track of my measurements. I will report these on a monthly basis. I will measure hips, waist and bust. This time around I measured 42inches around my bust (107cm), 36inches around my waist (91cm) and 51inches around my hip (130cm).

I keep sticking around the 220lb and I really want to push for the next 10lb before my first year is over. This means I need some support as I only have 6 weeks left before my first year is up. 10lb is 6 weeks does not seem to be a lot but as I have only lost 22lb since I started and that is over the course of almost a year, I think it is a challenge.

As I alluded too in the beginning of my post, so much has happened since my last post. Mainly due to my travels but also because the trip gave me a chance to realize that I am not happy with the job I currently have. Don’t get me wrong. It is a great company and I honestly think it would be hard to find a company that would treat me better and a job that is willing to pay me as well and I like my colleagues. However, it is the job itself that is not really giving me any joy. I am all about giving back, doing something for good and I am very much a minimalist by heart and being in marketing is pretty much the opposite. It is all about getting more money and selling more for huge companies and there is not any giving back or thinking about humanity or the planet for the future. I, therefore, have decided that I need to start thinking about what I would like to do next. I need to figure out what I really want to do and then just go for it. I have the best support system around me and so many people believing in me that I do not have any excuse. So stay tuned while I will probably talk about my options and what I want to do for the future… A LOT! And please feel free to send support, thoughts, ideas etc.

I, therefore, have decided that I need to start thinking about what I would like to do next.

Now to the fun part. My vacation! One of the reasons why I do work for a kick ass company is I was away from the office for 5 Weeks and they did not complain once. This meant that my husband and I were able to go to London, Porto, Lisbon, Paris and Denmark during that time.

London: I love Mike’s family. They are so welcoming and we attended the most beautiful wedding of Adrian and Jenny. Thank you for inviting us! We went to see 2 plays because you have to see plays in London (and musicals in New York) and both were awesome. The first one “Chinglish” was with Mike’s cousin and her husband and my in-laws. The second one was with Imelda Staunton (Professor Umbridge in Harry Potter) in “Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Wolff?”. She is an amazing actress. Love her! As much as I loved the wedding and the plays, my favorite part was “touristing” in London for once and getting a bit lost and finding some amazing gems we would not have otherwise. I, love getting lost.

As much as I loved the wedding and the plays, my favorite part was “touristing” in London for once and getting a bit lost and finding some amazing gems we would not have otherwise. I, love getting lost.

Porto: The most amazing Couchsurfing hosts.. ever (except for my husband of course ;)! The city is beautiful and there is so much history. I know everyone raves about Paris being the romantic city of Europe but obviously they have not been to Porto. It has couples everywhere… EVERYWHERE…. As beautiful as it is, I doubt I would go back. I feel like we saw everything we wanted and experienced what we needed to.

It has couples everywhere… EVERYWHERE….

Lisbon: I fell in love.. This city is beautiful, people are incredibly nice and Ana is there with her amazing wife… If the pace was not so slow, I would move there tomorrow. But it might be a town we would consider for retirement. Lisbon has history, culture, amazing nature and the food… the food… is amazing and amazingly cheap. Go now before Europe discovers their own hidden gem!

Go now before Europe discovers their own hidden gem!

Paris: As much as I love art, museums, history and cheese, I just did not love it. Perhaps, it was just me being already filled with impressions from Portugal that I had a hard time digesting the ones in Paris or if it is the number of snobbish people being on average so much higher than anywhere else in the world, or maybe a combination of the two that I had a hard time really enjoying Paris. We did meet a lot of family, we had not had the chance to meet until now which was amazing.

Denmark: I always wish that I had more time. There is never enough time, yet I do not want to live there either. It is a dilemma. I have been considering whether or not I need to live part time in Denmark and part time in New York but not sure if that could even work. Maybe one day or if I become ridiculously rich (which will never happen). Well, until then, I will just have to live with a few days each year. At least I came back to New York with family already in town. I loved having my sister in New York and my nephews. Did I mention how much I love my nephews and nieces? And how proud I am of them? My sisters are doing a kick-ass job with their kids and they will be just as beautiful on the inside when they grow up as they are now.

 

I always wish that I had more time. There is never enough time, yet I do not want to live there either. It is a dilemma.

Well, I think that was it for now. Stay tuned for the next post and hopefully 2-3 pounds lighter. Fingers crossed.

 

XoXo

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Week 39: Things Are Starting To Come Together

I got my extension to my extension! This means that I have an additional 10 months in the US legally, while waiting for my more permanent green card (10 year Green Card, as they are no longer permanent).

I did not want my blog to become too political but it is too hard to ignore the new administration that is completely void of integrity, moral and ethics. As someone who is going through the Green Card process legally, I am telling you, it is not easy. I am one of the fortunate ones. I am Danish, white and married to someone that is American and looks white (although half Venezuelan) and I have the option to legally find a way to stay in the US. Sometimes, I think, what if I was not Danish and white but Muslim and from Iran? What if I was staying in this country illegally because I had nowhere else to call home. Even though I feel the anxiety from waiting to see if I get my permanent Green Card and whether or not Trump is going to change the law/rules while I am out on vacation, I know that is nothing in comparison to what other people in this country is currently going through. My heart weeps for them and I am crossing my fingers that we all will get through these times unscathed and not too much damage to the foundation of what is the US (and quite possibly the world).

Even though I feel the anxiety from waiting to see if I get my permanent Green Card and whether or not Trump is going to change the law/rules while I am out on vacation, I know that is nothing in comparison to what other people in this country is currently going through.

With that said, and all of my anxiety, I am still excited that Mike and I are finally going on trip together. When I got my extension we finally agreed upon the destinations while in Europe. London, Porto, Lisbon, Paris, Denmark and back to London for a family wedding. I love to travel, learn, discover and go on adventures (hence the name of the blog). I know it will be a challenge to not gain too much weight while I am on vacation especially as it will be for 34 days. I will not have my scale with me but I will stay on track with the help of my measuring tape. It should tell me if I am going out of control, staying within my weight or perhaps even loosing weight. The Monday before take off I will make sure to list my dimension before I leave so we can all keep track of my progress while traveling.

I love to travel, learn, discover and go on adventures (hence the name of the blog).

I have never measured or kept track of my weight while traveling for this amount of time so this should be a first and I am sort of excited to see how all the walking, climbing, eating, drinking etc etc will effect my weight. There are definitely lessons to be learned and I can’t wait to see what I can do differently, better or all together stop doing while traveling. I am, also, excited to write about my trip, the adventures, the places and hopefully you will be inspired to go yourselves.

At the moment I have my head buried into several books Mike took out from the library about Portugal, Paris and England. I am trying to figure out my schedule in Denmark and I wanted to plan a few things to do and see there as well. I, usually, have more plans than I can actually do, especially, as I have to work from London and Denmark but the benefit of working New York hours is that there is room for adventure in the morning (before 1PM local time). I was thinking of doing “KattegatCentret” in Grenaa while visiting my dad, Aros when going to Aarhus and something else in or around Viborg, Herning or Holstebro when going there. Then at least Mike will not go insane from boredom. To my Danish readers, I would love some input and ideas of what could be fun to do or see in those areas while there. And for people who have been to Portugal and Paris let me know if there is something that we should check out that would not necessarily be in all the tourist books.

I, usually, have more plans than I can actually do, especially, as I have to work from London and Denmark but the benefit of working New York hours is that there is room for adventure in the morning (before 1PM local time).

I hope you can all help me stay on track and perhaps even drag me out for a workout while in London and Denmark.

About the past week. As you can tell from the image. I actually lost weight! I am super excited about that. Although, only 1.4lb from the past 2 weeks, I have been stuck in the 20’s for a while so it was good to see a 1 for a change. The past 2 weeks I have been staying on track with the gym, went to the Oyster and Beer Festival, played in the snow, took at stroll down the Highline after the show had fallen and baked the most delicous chocolate cake. I know I should not but I tried to make a more healthy version and it paid off. It is the best chocolate cake I have ever made (and that is counting my sisters wedding cake, which was amazing). Luckily, Mike ate most of it which is probably why I managed to loose a bit of weight. Check out the images below from the past week.

XoXo

 

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Week 37: Nerve Racking Time

Just to get the numbers out of the way. I gained 3.6lb from two weeks ago. I can’t say I am disappointed. I let myself have a wild night Saturday and I am pretty confident that alcohol is the culprit. I have been good with my diet otherwise and I am back in a good routine with my workouts. So if I can stick to my diet and my workouts I should be back in no time. Much of it is probably water weight. Alcohol messes with my system EVERY time. So stay tuned for next week.

As for my headline. As most of you know, I am in the middle of applying for a Green Card. We have a family wedding in London coming up in April but my extension is running out on March 17th. So I have been trying for over a month to get an appointment as I need an extension to my extension. Crazy, I know but apparently it takes between 1 and 2 years to get the condition off of the temporary Green Card.

With the Trump news, I have been an even more nervous wreck, even though I should not have anything to worry about. But the thought of traveling and then knowing that you have no idea what this man might come up with next and I might be the one in the airport not allowed back in is truly scary.

At my meeting today, I got to ask all of my questions. Questions such as, if they call me in for an interview while I am out of the country and I am unaware of my appointment. Then what? Technically, they could throw out my case, and I have to start over, but if I am traveling there are some leniency and I should be able to apply for a new appointment. If I get my permanent Green Card (permanent in the sense that I will have it for 10 years) while I am out of the country will my temporary one be invalid and not usable once I get back into the country? No, it will still be valid as long as I have my extension.

So with all of my questions answered and our minds put at ease, we have decided to go ahead with our travel plans. I am super excited. I should get thumbs up from my job tomorrow and we can go ahead and plan. The only downside is my sister, my nephews and her boyfriend and his kids are coming on April 1st while I will still be out of the country. I am hoping to be back early April 3rd though to be here with them for their last 4 days in New York. A bit of a bummer that things are falling around the same time but I think we can make it work.

If everything else falls in place, flights, job and the like we are most likely headed to Paris and Portugal this time around (besides our usual stop to London and Denmark of course). Super exited. Never been to Portugal and I have only been to Paris for 1 day (and a long time ago) so it will be great visiting places I have never been.

Let the planning commence and soon there will be blog posts about trying to loose weight while being on vacation. That is always a challenge. So should be good.

Most of all, I am happy for Mike. He has not had a vacation since Christmas of 2015. So about time he takes some time off.

If anyone of you have been to Portugal or Paris (or lives there) please send some recommendations our way.

So exited!

Xoxo

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Week 35: New Year, Should It Be A New You?

Week 35: has me thinking. I work in marketing and every year in January they all have the New Year, New You promotions going on. I came to thinking… it is not really about a new you but simply improving who you already are, no?

I think, I am pretty great. I am a good person, I care about others, I love my husband, my family and friends and I take my job seriously and make the most of it even though it is not my favorite job. So all in all, I am not a bad version of myself. However, there might be room for improvements. So should it, instead be Line 2.0? Sorta like an upgrade?

I do not think it is a bad idea to put the past year into perspective to see if there is something you would want to do differently, change or upgrade. We are not perfect, we are humans after all. I have therefore been thinking about the past year, the good, the bad and the really ugly and I encourage you to do the same and comment below with your thoughts, ideas or even if you think there are things I need to improve on or things that I am succeeding in (flatter will get you everywhere 😉 ).

The Good:
I started taking my health more seriously. I went to the doctor and I followed her instructions which actually got my cholesterol to a good place (still room for improvement). I should continue this interest and involvement with my own health so I have already made a list of doctors I need to reach out to. I need to find myself a good Gynecologist (if you know of anyone in New York, let me know), I need a new psychologist (they have to specialize in Childhood Abuse, so this one might take a while and a few tries), I need a new dentist, I am REALLY uncomfortable with dentists so I need someone who is not mean and who takes into account that I will be deathly scared of him/her and lastly, but not least, an ophthalmologist (yeah, I had to google that name, no way I could spell that without looking it up first). I have NEVER had my eyes checked so I should probably get on that, since both my parents wear glasses and both have challenges in that department. If any of you live in or have lived in New York and have great recommendations please let me know (you can comment or message me).

Mike and I have really focused on being there for each other and it is paying off. I do not think, I have ever been this in love with my husband as I am currently. It is the best and strangest thing ever. The love just seems to continuously grow. I remember growing up everyone would say that you simply just get to the comfortable stage and “falling in love” turns into “love”, I feel like we are still falling, which I am so excited about. LOVE YOU!

The Bad:
Insignificant Online Fights (IOFs from now on) tend to creep up at times when I communicate online. I need to 1) get better and not sounding like a grumpy B**ch. I have had them with family, friends and random people I do not even know. 2) It is not worth the effort to be discussing subjects with someone I do not even know. I need to get better at just ignoring people that are just trying to egg me on. I always want to be right so that is where it all starts. i should find ways to distract me from these IOFs so that I do not have to deal with them and they should definitely not keep me up at night (they have done that with family members, I just love them to god damn much)…

The Ugly:
Honestly, I tend to be a bit of a b**ch. I say this in the nicest way possible but I have at times been selfish and I have not really had the energy to deal with people, especially people that demands too much of me. It has been a year with a deep depression (hence the need for a new psychologist) and therefore the energy simply has not been there. This means that friends have been neglected, family has been neglected (or some of you and I should personally apologize to my father as I have not really been able to be there for him).   This is something I hope, with my active changes for the year (eating based on what gives me energy, getting my vitamin D levels up, seeing a psychologist regularly, again, and keeping up with my exercises should help me be less b**chy and have more energy for people who really deserves my attention and love.

So there you have it. My game plan for 2017. Keep up with my health (physically and emotionally), spread the love and stop wasting positive energy on things that does not really matter. I hope you can all keep me to it and would love to hear what 2017 might look for all of you.

XOXO

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