Week 18: Getting Too Busy


Week 18: I must admit, I do not have a recent picture from my scale but I went up and then down. Now I am around 224lb (101.6kg). As I am currently, in a summer home in Denmark I do not have access to a scale so I will have to skip the most recent image.

I would not say being in Denmark is any easier. Food is abundant and there is always an excuse. I am trying hard to stay on the straight and arrow but I have fallen into the cakes a few times. I have instead been working out almost every day. I had completely forgotten how much I enjoy swimming.

Luckily, my family has been a great support and have been working out with me most of the days I have been here. Having been away from Denmark for so many years, I am starting to appreciate it more and more. And I still love our nature. Denmark is beautiful.


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I know, I have not written in 7 weeks which is not really great, both for my own progress but also, for you my kind readers. Work got insane and I honestly did not really have the energy if I also had to focus on my gym time. I will say though that even though the scale is not showing it I feel much better and my clothes fits just right now. Feels great!

I am still keeping my motivation and I am still trying to make the right choices but I do keep falling into the same issue of having excuses. I need to not even think about excuses. I, honestly, do not have any excuses. Not any good excuses anyways.

How do you all get motivated when you have to do something you do not particularly enjoy? Usually, music helps. It distracts me and I can sing along which makes me feel better (I might be addicted to singing). Any distractions really. As long as it keeps me from thinking about treats. Although, I am the kind of person that needs downtime and just needs to lay in bed and watch TV which is the time where I tend to eat things I should not (this is when I am alone, though). So I can’t have “downtime” alone. Mike always has to be with me. I really should figure out how to not crave sweets the way that I do when I am alone.

I have been thinking a lot about why I crave sweets, usually when I am alone and I do not have anything special on my agenda. Why is it that it is when I am alone and when I can’t distract myself. I think there are a few reasons for this. One, my childhood. Whenever, I would come home from school, I would be alone and I would, like I do to this day, go through all of our kitchen cabinets to find food. After finding whatever treats I could find, I would go in front of the TV and have my “alone time” before my family would get home. I do the exact same thing today. Is this a sign that I need to grow up? Or has the routine just become that? A routine? How do I break that routine?

That is my next project in my weightloss adventure. How do I break my habits of eating in front of the TV? I have already spent hours researching this so I have a few ideas already. One thing, I can think of first hand is. I am incredibly bad at making sure that I have healthy snack foods in the fridge. I need to create more healthy snack foods around me so I can exchange the bad foods with the healthy. I do not think my “downtime” is a bad thing. We all need it. It just does not have to be focused around sweets. If I could kick the habit completely that would be great but lets take small steps and see if having healthier options in the fridge and ready to go would not be a help.

Should any of you have great knowledge or ideas on how to kick my bad habit of eating junk in front of the computer please do not hesitate to leave a comment below. I am open to ideas and if I think I could incorporate the idea, I might even write about my experience.

Have a great day from Denmark!







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Week 11: Cholesterol

Down 7lb from last time

Week 11: It has been a while since last. Times at work got crazy so I prioritized my husband and my work outs in my spare time. It seems to have worked out. I am now at 226.4lb (102.5kg) which is a loss of 7 lb (3.2kg) from 3 weeks ago. The week after I got back from my mini vacation was a little tough so I must admit that the 6 of the 7 pounds have come off the past two weeks but hey nothing is perfect.

One of the reasons I started this journey was due to my health. I am not deadly ill but I do have among other things high cholesterol which is one of the main causes of heart diseases. The number 1 cause of death in America. I don’t want to be a statistic and looking at my family’s health I could very easily become one. My parents are not too healthy and I have certainly inherited some of their habits. Habits which I am trying hard to break but that is not what this post is about. I wanted to give some information about cholesterol. I do not think people are aware or want to be faced with what it means to have high cholesterol. And there certainly are many myths about it.

High cholesterol aren’t only seen in overweight/obese people. It can hit anyone especially if they have high amounts of fat intake. Because overweight and obese folks (like myself) would not get to our size without eating a lot of fats in our diet you will see an increasingly high number of overweight and obese people with high cholesterol.

I got myself into this mess by not controlling my binges, which was usually a combination of ice cream, cake, nutella on bread or cookies. So yeah, there you go. ALL sugar at fats. It tasted good though but those days have to be over.

Cholesterol is a waxy substance that comes from two sources: your body and food. Your body needs some cholesterol to make hormones, vitamin D, and substances that help you digest foods. Cholesterol travels through your bloodstream in small packages called lipoproteins. These packages are made of fat (lipid) on the inside and proteins on the outside. Two kinds of lipoproteins carry cholesterol throughout your body: low-density lipoproteins (LDL) and high-density lipoproteins (HDL). LDL cholesterol sometimes is called “bad” cholesterol. A high LDL level leads to a buildup of cholesterol in your arteries. HDL cholesterol sometimes is called “good” cholesterol. This is because it carries cholesterol from other parts of your body back to your liver. Your liver removes the cholesterol from your body.

This is a great sum up of Cholesterol from the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute but they don’t mention what the fat is. When you get your cholesterol measured by the doctor. They look at 3 numbers. The LDL (which should be less than 130mg), the HDL (which should be above 46 mg) and lastly the triglycerides.  Triglycerides are a type of fat (lipid) found in your blood. When you eat, your body converts any calories it doesn’t need to use right away into triglycerides. The triglycerides are stored in your fat cells. Later, hormones release triglycerides for energy between meals. If you regularly eat more calories than you burn, particularly “easy” calories like carbohydrates and fats, you may have high triglycerides. Triglycerides needs to be less than 150. I believe in Denmark the doctor usually only gives you one number, HDL Ratio which is a combination of 4 numbers. Your total cholesterol, HDL number, LDL number and your triglycerides. If you have slightly high LDL but still high HDL, you might show up with high cholesterol but since your HDL (the cholesterol that takes away fats) is high you are technically not at high risk of heart diseases so I urge you to ask your doctor for the specific numbers so you have an idea of what number you need to work on and how serious it is.

Personally, my numbers are not in my favor. My HDL is low, my LDL is not high but on the edge and I have a very high amount of triglycerides. Which means I have an excess amount of fat in my bloodstream but not enough HDL to take it away which means my LDL is on the rise (which is what can cause plaque in your arteries, and then lead to heart disease). I need to reverse this trend. That means, try and stay away from binging as best as I can and eliminate high fat foods from my kitchen. This of course, also, means that I need to loose weight so my liver understands that it does not need to keep feeding my body cholesterol.

When I learned about how the cholesterol makes vitamin D in your body and how cholesterol comes into your bloodstream, I had an aha moment. I have had a long period of depression, unusually long for me, I knew I had to check my vitamin D levels (Vitamin D is what helps keep us in a good mood, for example when summer comes around and the sun is out it lifts your spirits. You feel lighter and more happy. This is because the sun is feeding you vitamin D). And sure enough, I am almost at the deficiency level of (only 1 point off) vitamin D. So my binges have not been psychological as I always had thought they were but more likely they were physiological. My body was screaming for more vitamin D so I feed it high fats to create more cholesterol so it could create more vitamin D. Needless to say, I have now started on a high dose of vitamin D. Hope this will help on everything. Still have to go to the gym and watch what I eat but perhaps I can get a little more control over my binging. Crossing my fingers that I might be right. I might not have an eating disorder after all. This sorta excites me.

I recommend if you discover that you have high cholesterol. Do not hesitate to ask your doctor ALL the questions you can think off and perhaps they know of a good website to go to for more information. I am happy that my doctor is not the type that pushes for medication but rather more natural remedies (exercise, low fat diet, fish oil and vitamin D was her prescription). If I work hard at my diet and my weight, she will check my numbers again in 3 months and if I can prove that with some Vitamin D, fish oil (helps on cholesterol), exercise and a healthier diet that I can move the needle on my numbers, she is fine with not prescribing any medication. In fact it seems to be her first choice.

If you like me, can’t control your binges. You have worked on your mental health and feel like you have worked through most of your major issues then you might want to check your vitamin D levels. Especially, if you are in a location where there are more seasons. You might not get enough vitamin D from your foods or the sun. I was naive enough to think I did.

Feel free to comment or reach out if you have any questions. I am not an expert but I have gotten a good sense of where to look for helpful information. But always as your doctor if you can.

Want to give some credit from a few websites that I have been frequently visiting:






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Week 8: Support Is Essential

Week 8: Scale

Week 8: If you think you can do it alone… Think again! I have tried so many times loosing the weight on my own and I would be so excited when people would notice the difference but once I got the compliment I would fall back into my old habits.

This time it is all about making my surroundings aware of my plan so they have a chance to support me and be my cheerleader when I need it the most. I am a person who does not have a lot of friends but the ones that I do have, I cherish and I don’t know where I would be today without them.

I love my family and I love my husband but there is nothing like having a friend – a true friend, who will be there for you even when you are being ridiculous, silly or in need of a good verbal spanking.

Claudia, Me, Shelley - Missouri 2016

One of my best friends here in the States moved from Florida to Missouri. She is the quintessential woman of strength. With other words, Shelley is AMAZING! Another best friend of mine, Claudia, fabulous and ‘I am not sure where I would be in life, if it was not for her’ kinda friend, and I decided to trek out to Missouri for a visit.

One of our better ideas, if I may say so myself. It has been a bit of a stressful time, with work, moving, starting the blog and I could go on. Not until I sat on the front porch of my friends, from now Missouri, with a glass of wine in my hand did I realize how badly, I needed a small vacation where I could shut off from the hustle and bustle from daily life and just kick back and enjoy.

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I was on vacation and I was going to enjoy so I decided to have 1 day of just eating and drinking until I could not stand and another day where I would control my portions a bit more but still enjoy the yummy barbecue they have around these parts. It was close to Kansas City and summer time. Perfect for barbecuing. To not completely destroy my last few weeks hard work I also wanted to get a workout in (ideally two but that would have been pushing it).

Margarita for no money...

It is in those times that you realize how amazing your friends are. They went on a workout with me. How amazing is that. In the hot sun of noon they went to the local college football stadium and worked out with me. It was a tough one. The day before we had been merrily drinking and eating the entire day away and I must admit I was a bit hungover Saturday morning, yet they were dressed and ready to go.

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THIS is the type of support and motivation you need at times. People, who are willing to do the hard work with you even when they really do not want to but they love you enough to do it and support you. To Shelley and Claudia, I know you are reading this blog post… I love you and appreciate you! Thank you for the talks, the support and your thoughts.

So my advise to anyone trying to loose weight. Lean on your friends and loved ones when it is tough and good choices are hard to make. And as you can see, just because you are traveling, there are no excuses not to work out!



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Week 7: Time To Concur A Fear

Week 7

Week 7, this week I will skip the pictures besides from my number above. As you can see I managed to loose almost 2lb (1kg). I am pretty proud of myself. 2lb includes 4th of July celebrations and my husband and I’s three year anniversary.

This week will be about me facing or at least acknowledging my fear of loosing weight. I know this sounds odd but hear me out.

First of all, when it comes down to loosing weight, I am the one who needs to do it. I am the one putting food in my mouth and I am the one making the choices about what I put in and digest. I am also the one who makes the decision about when to go to the gym and how long and hard that workout needs to be. I have talked myself into eating things I should not and skipped the gym when I shouldn’t and I will probably keep doing that until the day I die but if I could just somehow be okay with not using food as an excuse or a tool. A tool to hide from the world, a tool to not reach my full potential that would be a wonderful day.

Like most people who are overweight, obese or just think they weigh a little too much, I have tried so many different things. Here are just to mention a few:

  • Electricity through my body (which my mother brought me to as a teenager)
  • Diets (the amount of diets a innumerable at this point but I tried the first with my mother, cabbage diet I believe was the first one, then the Atkinson diet and I could go on and on and on)
  • Well meaning suggestions but somehow they always came out cruel (my aunt and uncle thought it appropriate to tell me every time they saw me that I should bike more, did I mention that I biked at least 7miles (10km) every day as a teenager? They were convinced that then I would loose weight – they believed me to be overweight – mind you that I was technically not overweight, I just looked that way. I was 5 feet 5 inches (1.65 meter) and weighed between 132 and 143lb (60-65kg))
  • I tried starving myself (No one really noticed that I did not eat. I would sit with my mother and my step-father at the very small table, yet they never noticed that I sorta just bounced the potato back and forth, would pretend going for seconds and sit down with even less than when I got up to get seconds and then bounce the potato back and forth again, as if I was still eating – mind-boggling today but I did not think of it back then).
  • I tried trowing up after every meal or at least whenever I had a meal and that would usually only happen once a day (this lasted for almost a year and a half and I was never as skinny as then (120lb/55kg), although probably not the most healthy).

Suffice to say, none of my strategies were a huge success. I am obese and I have never weighed as much as I do now. Which leads me to think, that I am going at this weightloss thing the wrong way. If I look at what I have already gone through and if I ask myself, why do I feel the need to hide, that might lead me somewhere. If I could crack the code of WHY and combining it with a little bit of love and respect for myself, no matter what other people think, then I might get somewhere.

When I read this, I sorta wanna cry… I seems a little daunting and just the fact that I have to realize that I really do not like myself, I don’t love myself and least of all my body. It is a shame as I do think I am a good person who cares. I try to do my best every day, I just get hard on myself and question why I feel the need to point out every time I fail, instead of giving myself a pad on the back and tell myself that I did an amazing job and be proud of the good choices that I have made instead of getting down on myself for the bad choices that I make.

Perhaps, it is time for some soul searching and figuring out why I feel the need to hide, why I am so hard on myself. I already have an idea of some of this but I think that is what some of my posts will have to be about. Brutal honesty. The good, the bad and the very very ugly.

I will have to apologize as I know that I might hurt some people along the way but I think the only way to the other side is through and that is not a time to be considerate and think about how other people feel. It is time that things are about me and what I need to do in order to heal and get the most out of life. I owe it to my husband, I owe it to my family and I owe it to myself, most importantly.

Be on the look out for the next weekly post!



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Week 6: Moving Chaos



Week 6, I have to apologize for my absence. In the beginning of June (right after my last post) we were told that our lease was up and it was time to move out. If you are a friend who are or have lived in New York you know the challenge of finding an apartment here in New York so everything was set in to finding an apartment and thus, my blog suffered.

But I am back! Not much lighter but considering the circumstances I am just happy that I did not gain. I went down to 239.4lb (108.59kg) which was a loss of .6lb (0.3kg). It was a time of eating out and stressing. First with finding a place and then having to move and live among moving boxes for the first week.

After 2 weeks of intense searching we found the perfect apartment and I am living without a roommate (I do not consider my husband my roommate 😉 ) for the first time in almost 8 year. It is a miracle! Never thought that was going to happen. Apartments here in New York are expensive and often small if you do not look in the right neighborhood. We were lucky enough to find a rent stabilized apartment in our favorite neighborhood and we only had to move 3 blocks away. Yay! It is still quite an increase from what we used to pay but we thought why not? We can afford it now and we have lived with roommates for a long time. My husband has lived with roommates even longer than me (coming up on 10 years). It was time for a change.

So here we are after packing and moving and spending a few days looking for extra furniture and unpacking. You do not really realize how much crap you have until you move and we have agreed that nothing gets put away unless we have both gone through it as we need to get rid of stuff. There are boxes that has not been opened the past 10 years so who knows that is in them. I dread the day we get to those boxes. It is going to be all Yankee and ex-girlfriend memorabilia. Just found a pillow case with “Mike, I love you! – Name of ex-girlfriend. Eak! Well suffice to say.. said pillow case is no longer with us.

Here are a few pictures of the chaos that is our home at the moment:


The kitchen is the most sorted room so far. We picked up a kitchen cart yesterday which is not in the picture But it will be located be the window you can see on the left side.


Our new entry way. With a tall closet and our buffet table (currently holding all of my empty bags). Should be nice once everything is set up so in a couple of month you will see the final result. I hope!


Our living room. Some has been set up but as you can see it is mostly holding all of the stuff that we actually have to go through. Mind you we have already gone through roughly 10 boxes worth of stuff and we have thrown out 4 box, 3 boxes to give away and we have kept 3 boxes. I like how we are headed with this sorting.

My challenge now is to find days where I can go to the gym and still have time to cook, unpack and so forth. I do have long work days so time can be challenging. Especially, when I insist on at least 7 hours of sleep. But I hope with summer Fridays (every other Friday I get off at work) that I can eventually make a dent in all this stuff.

I must admit. I have not had the great start to my weightloss that I thought I would have but at least it is a weight off my shoulders finally having my own place and I now have a chance to fulfill my need for nesting. I am female after all…



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Week 2: Already Off Track



Week 2, what can I say. Yes I lost a bit of weight (2.2 pounds/1kg) but I definitely, did not do what I could. I was a bit too generous with myself. It is a constant struggle of not eating that cake, croissant or ice cream that is right in front of me. I can’t put myself in an environment where there is no cake, ice cream or what have you. At work they have it, my husband has it and honestly, even if I do not have anything at home, I just go to the local store and get whatever I want. There is no self control at this point. I am a bit furious with myself, to say the least.

I wish there was a magic wand where I did not crave sugary and fatty things. No hypnosis is not for me, I do not take drugs in any way (I even have declined happy pills for my depression) so it is all based on will-power and being honest and open.

Sometimes when I read about peoples opinions about overweight people (you know what kind of comments I am talking about, you might have read them yourself, written them yourself or tried defending obese/overweight people in the comments section) and how we should simply just stop eating. It puts me in a unique position to think about people that have culture, habits and so forth so deeply ingrained in them that things do not “simply” change because you say so and this is even contingent on the fact that people want to change. It makes me wonder if we as a species are doomed?

But enough of the self pity… I am back on the horse and I am determined to go to the gym 3 times this week and attend the Bryant Park free yoga Thursday evening. So stay tuned for more on that front.. Should be hilarious pictures. I am so not a yoga person but I need to switch it up once and a while and also, it is all about the adventure. Who would not want to try yoga with 500 other people in a beautiful green park in the middle of New York? It is full on Sex and The City!

See you soon, feel free to join me for some yoga fun on Thursday!





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Summer Friday Fun

Whitney Museum 5/27/2016 - Fashion Photography

My first post about one of the many distractions I need to find throughout the week to not eat all the stuff that I should not be eating. Besides this one day, I have spent my evenings sowing my husbands clothes that has holes in them, working out, went to the Broadway musical Fun Home and beginning this blog.

On Friday, May 27th,  Memorial Day weekend, the office decided we could leave early. Time to take advantage of time that I normally do not get. While I was waiting for my husband to finish up his work I walked up to Central Park to meet and have lunch with him. It was one of the first days of summer so full humidity had not kicked in yet. It was a gorgeous day that I simply could not take for granted. We had already planned Oysters and The Whitney but now that we had a little extra time, lunch and a visit to his parents was added to the agenda.


After lunch at Central Park we walked up to his parents (who lives just a few blocks away from where we had lunch). This morning my husband and our roommate had installed our A/C and there were gaps in the window that needed to be covered. His mom was cleaning out her portfolio (she was/is an interior decorator) of sketches and she was throwing out so good pieces of cardboard that we could use to cover up the wholes. With two big pieces of cardboard (barely fit into one of those large CVS plastic bags) in hand I went to our favorite oyster place to put our name in.

Cull and Pistol, located in Chelsea Market, has $1 oysters (any oyster on the menu) every Friday from 4-6pm and although I have high cholesterol we do indulge every 6 months or so.

It is usually an hours way so I went to the bookstore in Chelsea Market and perused their Recipe Books Section. I usually take a picture of the books that I would like to read and I borrow them at the library. It is a great way to save money and to kill less trees in the world.

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After taking a basillian pictures of books Mike (my hubby, if you had not guessed) arrived and few minutes later our table was ready (talking about good timing – he is excellent at that).

After we devoured 8 oysters each and a liter of water we walked down to stand in line to get into The Whitney during their “Pay As You Wish” time (every Friday from 7-10pm).

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When I was younger I was not really into art but then I discovered drawings and how amazing photography can be and I can’t get enough of either. I will let the pictures speak for themselves and I can only encourage you to visit your local museum or art gallery once in a while. You can’t help but get inspired.

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Week 1: Butterflies

Week 1

My first week, my first post. I have butterflies. This is what is going to set the tone for my blog, it is now that I commit for the first time in my life, it is now that I truly break away from what my parents and I taught myself growing up.

I know, I will make mistakes, even though I know it is natural and OK, it still freaks me out. So much is at stake. Years of my lift is at stake at this point and I have already done damage to my body. I can no longer ignore the fact that I am obese. I am struggling with high blood pressure, high cholesterol (not just due to being overweight but family history) and an addiction. I am addicted to sugar, fat… food. I think about my next fix as soon as I have finished my first. When I was younger, I was the one who would barely eat, throw up if I did eat because I was feeling so disgusting. I was anorexic and bulimic. Now, I eat, feel disgusted with myself and eat some more because that moment when I eat, I do not think about anything but what I am eating. It is a vicious circle. I have gone to therapy and I have been part of Weight Watchers, I have wanted to get friends to lose weight with me. I have tried it all… except for 1 thing. I have never tried being honest. This is my pledge. I will be as honest as I can be with everything that I write, as open about who I am, what I eat, how much I exercise. I have nothing to loose at this point.

It is a bit scary as I have always hidden my eating habits. Not even my husband knows how much I at times can eat in one sitting. Every time I see a TV Show or read a blog, I feel people change their lives drastically and honestly, how many of us has that kind of freedom or the desire to change our lives where fitness becomes the main focus of our lives? Not me. I want to go out and have fun, I want to explore, I want to have adventures. Which is why I named my blog A Weightloss Adventure.

I want my cookie and I want to have fun while eating it but I also want to be healthy. That is what my blog is about. Having fun, allowing some of the foods that I love while still striving for a healthy and normal body.

Fun Home
We love being goofy

I do believe if you need to lose weight, you need a goal. My overall goal is to loose 100lb (45kg) but I want to take it in chunks and I want to take my time. If I want my cookie as well, I need to arm myself with patience.

So with that said, I believe it is time to walk through my first week. My status report.

I started my first week with a weight of 242.2lb (109.9kg). Measurements were 50″ around my hips, 42″ around my waist, 47″ around my bust and 17″ around my arms. I am 5′ 5″ so you can calculate that I am in the obese category.

I think I carry myself well. I dress well. Which means that I have been able to hide just how overweight I really am. So there it is. The image proving my weight.

It has not been an easy week and I have definitely had my fair share of things I should not have eaten but I have been able to keep my overeating to a minimum and I look forward to seeing what the scale says tomorrow morning.

See you tomorrow!



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